i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
