After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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