I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
