we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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