i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
