Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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