idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
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