So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
