New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
