o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
