Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
you traded sex for a burrito?
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
