Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
