Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
