Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
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