there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
