I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I am naked and annoyed.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
