"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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