Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
