What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Randomize
