I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
