I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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