So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
We just shotgunned beers for America
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
