I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Randomize