Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
