I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
please come you make the beer taste better
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
