Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
