I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
