You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Pi�atas plus fireworks don't mix well
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
