Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
