Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
