Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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