I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
