i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize
