You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
