"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize