I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
