so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
