I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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