Pappa wants mamma naked
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize