On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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