So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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