dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
My penis needs a shock collar
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
try to milk me bitch
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