Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
