ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
