I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize