did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
