We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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