If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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