it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
