oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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